Underneath the underneath
by ilikechopstix
Summary: I promised i would bring him back to you.
1. It suited him well

I worked on this alongside with ch5 of giving up, i wrote it because i had a similar loss in my life, and i guess thats how i was able to write this one...

(edit:changed title in request from some readers)

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"I told you Sakura-chan… I would bring him back to you…" and with that he made one more seal. The flame like chakra around him dancing to his seals and becoming even more violent and unpredictable than before. 

"Naruto! Stop it!" I yelled helplessly, unable to get close, the intense flames threatening to burn me if I got any closer. "Sasuke-kun is already safe, You don't need to do anything anymore! Come back!"

In between the flailing flames, I could see his face, it was calm… peaceful, he smiled to me… not his cocky smirk, but a genuine smile that said… Sorry…

"Naruto!!!" I yelled one more time. I wanted to make a sprint to the moron, stop him before he destroyed this place and himself. But a pair of powerful arms grabbed me from the waste and jerked me towards the opposite direction. "Yamato-taichou! Stop! Naruto is – "

"There's no time, we must leave!" he said hastily. Over his shoulder I looked back to the ball of fire.

"Kyuukyoku Honoo no Jutsu!" I heard from behind them, there was nothing else I could do…

A deafening sonic boom followed those words, Yamato-taichou was running faster and faster, from the shining bright light behind us, it was getting close… this light consumed what was left of Akatsuki, and pretty soon, it consumed us too…

-

"Naruto!" I yelled sitting up.

Only a silent white room greeted my scream. My voice slightly echoed around a bit before I realized I was alone in this small room… the hospital?

I looked around once, just me in the standard hospital bed, IV tubes in my right arm, a monitor watching my heartbeat… it was normal, my heartbeat, so I'm guessing I'm not hurt too much…

Naruto… "Naruto!" I yelled once more, repeating my thoughts.

It all hit me quickly, I remember… all I remember… in the Akatsuki underground hideout… we battled with Akatsuki… we fought our way towards Sasuke-kun… and we stopped him before his brother could kill him… they gave chase to us as we fled with Sasuke-kun… and Naruto… He…

I felt some tears welling up in my eyes, there's no way…

"No way… No way…" I sobbed quietly, "He can't be dead…" I closed my eyes, trying to wake up from this strange dream, or better yet, Naruto would jump in and yell this was all some crazy ass prank he put together… He's not dead… "He's not dead… He's not…"

"Sakura…" said a voice, I opened my eyes and looked to the voice's owner.

"Kakashi-sensei…" I said, still sobbing quietly. I didn't even notice him walk into the room… how long has he been watching me cry?

"Your awake… good." he said a little shaky, it almost sounded as If he didn't know what to say… that's not him… he always knew what to say… "How are you feeling Sakura?"

I rubbed the tears out of my eyes, "Fine… just, a little tired I guess…" I said trying to hide my hurt feelings…

"I wouldn't be surprised… you battled fiercely against Akatsuki and Sasuke's group." He said approaching the left side of my bed.

"Yeah…" I said finally putting away my tears. "How long have I been out?" I asked trying to change the subject.

"About a full day Sakura, its almost five thirty.."

"Ah, I see."

We paused there, silence fell upon the room, it was awkward and seemed to drag forever. I looked at my lap, and Kakashi-sensei gazed out the window, I knew what he wanted to talk about… and I wanted to too…

"Kakashi-sensei…"

"Hmm?" he responded casually.

"How… how is … Sasuke-kun… is he ok?" I said straying from what I really wanted to know.

Kakashi-sensei let out a slight breathe, I guess he was expecting a different question. "He's fine… he's still sleeping."

"Good… good…" I said pessimistically

"Sakura, Naruto is –" he suddenly started, I guess sensing my feelings.

"He's not dead!" I blurted out, finishing his sentence.

"Sakura, you know as well as I do…"

"No!" I yelled denying everything he was trying to tell me. "He's not dead! He _can't_ die!"

He sat on my bedside, I felt aggravated, listening to all this nonsense… but…

"Sakura… listen to me… you and I both saw what we saw as we fled the underground hideout… Yamato had to actually carry you out from what you were watching."

"So…?" I said feeling my tears returning.

I closed my eyes one more time… I had to wake up… this is just a bad dream.

He let out a deep breathe, he sounded sad. "Sakura, I'm going to miss him too…" he finally said.

That did it right there… I broke out into a complete frenzy of tears, moans, and screams, I let it all out, it wouldn't stay inside any more... I just can't accept it… why did he go and do something so fucking stupid?? God damnit…

"Why Kakashi-sensei why…." I asked grabbing his arm and crying into it. "Why did he do that??" I continued.

He didn't respond for awhile. He let me cry into his arm… "He did it because he wanted to save us…" he said finally, I could hear the pain in his voice. "He did the right thing… if he didn't, then we would have all died and Sasuke would have died with us, and our mission would have failed…" he said trying to sound professional, but it was no use, he was trying way to hard to hide his tears. But you could hear them in his voice as he tried to patronize Naruto… "Damnit… I should have been the one to stay behind… not him…"

We sat there a while longer, crying over our loss… as I cried into his now tear soaked arm, Images… pictures… moments, flashed before my eyes… I could still see him. He was smiling… his signature fox grin, I always thought it was annoying… it suited him well…

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Positive flames welcome. 


	2. Not so long ago

Hello.

i decided to take a break from giving up for a bit. so i decided to take my break by putting an extra chapter for this little oneshot. maybe a few more?

and i will work on another chapter for the story. expect that one soon.

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I walked down the busy street, it was rush hour. It was crowded, sweaty, and loud all around me. The oppressive heat beat down on my neck as people yelled orders at one another, or getting directions from somebody across the river of people, and children running around weaving in between adults and bumping into other people like me, playing tag all while screaming at the top of their lungs. I made sure that they didn't pick my pocket which was full of cash…But even with all this noise, it was still to quiet for my taste. 

Once upon a time not so long ago, I walked down this same busy street, in the same hour… but that time I was with Naruto. That time, we were on our way to Tsunade-sama's office to receive our orders. And boy did his voice overpower the people's…

If I had known how that mission was going to turn out… I probably would have spent more time with him that day…

-

We bumped in one person after another as we headed towards the office, it was loud, but Naruto was louder.

"Sakura-chan!" lets get some ramen!" Naruto said nearly hopping around in a fit of joy.

"No, no!" I responded sternly, "We need to get to Tsunade-sama right away. Do you have ANY idea how angry she can be?"

"Hmm…" he said folding his arms across his chest, ceasing his fit of joy. "Nope, but it can't be that bad!" he said still in an loud up tone voice.

I brought my hand to my head to rub away a mild headache that was forming near my frontal lobe. I pictured Tsunade-sama angry and irate… it wasn't pretty.

"Come on! It'll be my treat this time…" he said nearly begging.

Hmm, free food… and we _do_ have thirty minutes before we have to meet Tsunade-sama, and I did skip breakfast this morning for a new diet I'm trying out. "Alright then… But if you run short on cash I'm leaving you there to clean dishes."

"Don't worry! I have plenty of cash!" he said patting his back pocket.

We arrived at Ichiraku shortly… Naruto knew a shortcut there, but then again… he knew all of the shortcuts to his favorite restaurant… any other time I would have thought his obsession to Ichiraku strange and weird… but this time, I was actually kind of hungry, and he offered to treat me so I didn't complain this time.

"Hey old man!" said Naruto as he sat in front of the bar.

"Hey Naruto!" I said joining him. "Be more polite to your elders!" I said slapping the back of his head.

"Ah! Naruto!" said the… old man… from behind the bar. "What'll it be for you and your girlfriend today?"

G-girlfriend?

"Oh, Ya know, the usual, Extra large Miso ramen with Tempura, with extra, extra noodles with a raw egg…" he said rubbing the back of his head.

"And…" I started shaking off the _old _man's comment. "one small diet Ramen please…" I said finally cooling off.

"Diet Ramen?" Naruto said looking over to me with a confused face. "Why are you getting the Diet Ramen Sakura-chan?" he said putting his elbow on the bar.

"Cause… It's healthy, and it tastes good… besides… it's popular with the women in Konoha." I said lying about the taste, in actuality it tasted like a boot to me, but I didn't want him to know that, and I wanted to stick to my low calorie diet.

"Aw come on Sakura-chan! That bowl tastes like an old boot!" he said… reading my mind, while pouting a little.

"Well, then what do you suggest?"

"Hmm… you should get what I got, its great…" he said drooling on the corner of his mouth like a retard.

I thought about it for a brief moment. Miso is good, and the raw egg should bring out its flavor, and I haven't really had a wholesome meal in a while…. I debated a while longer in my head, but then I quickly voted against it, all those calories would eventually catch up to me and go straight to my hips.

"Sakura-chan… are you on a diet?"

"Y-yeah… so?" I responded feeling a little embarrassed of my figure.

"You don't need to go on a diet, you have a great body!" he said giving me one of Lee-san's and Gai-sensei's copyrighted nice guy poses.

I felt a blush come to my cheeks. "Thanks…. Naruto." Maybe I'll just stray from my diet a little bit today…

"No Probl- "

"Ill have the medium Chicken Ramen with Diet Noodles please." I said cutting off Naruto mid-sentence with the back of my hand.

"OW! What the hell was that for?!" he yelled lying on the ground cradling his bloody nose.

"That was for looking at my body that way…" I said calmly feeling proud of what I did for women around the world. "And don't forget, if you run out of money, im leaving you hear to clean dishes…"

He gulped a little as he took one bloody hand to his back pocket patting his rear pocket.

"Naruto…" I said growling at him.

"Er… umm… Don't worry! I have the cash right here…" he said, his voice shaking and trembling.

He got pick pocketed…. Geez… oh well…

"Make that a large Chicken Noodles please!" That'll teach him to get pick pocketed… extra dishes for a more expensive meal…

"Alrighty then… adding the large bowl of chicken ramen which brings the total up to, thirty four dollars and fifty four cents." He said tapping his pencil to his chin. "Oh, and Naruto… I expect you will pay off your tabs today, I heard you got paid for your last mission…"

I looked back over at Naruto who was now tearing over the extra work he was going to have to do. Classic…

-

"Ah, Sakura-chan." Said an elderly voice.

"Huh?" I said looking up to whoever called me.

"Welcome back to Ichiraku…"

In my daydream I had subconsciously walked into Ichiraku.

"Hello sir." I said despondent, and a little confused to where I was. "How are you today?"

"Hm? Me? Oh I'm fine, today is a bit slow, and I'm one hand short without my daughter, but I'm doing alright. Here take a seat." He said pointing to the nearest stool.

"Oh? Where is Ayame-san? Is she ok?" I said as I took the seat.

"Hmm, I don't know really. Two days ago she said she had a really bad feeling for some reason, and ever since she hasn't come to work."

"I see." I said looking at the wooden bar… I think I know why she had a bad feeling that day…

"Where's Naruto? I'm surprised he didn't come with you today." He said looking around to make sure he didn't miss him as I entered.

"He's… gone…"

"Oh, well that's to bad, he loves ramen you know." He said a little disappointed, not getting what I meant.

"Yeah… I know." I said trying to keep tears from forming in my eyes.

"Well, it certainly is strange that Naruto hasn't come in almost three days… anyway what will you have?" he said bringing out a piece of paper and pencil.

"I'll have an extra large Miso ramen with tempura, with extra, extra noodles and a raw egg."

"Alrighty, that'll be… twenty dollars…" he said writing it down.

"Sorry, but could I do some dishes to pay it off?"

"Hmm? you have no money?" asked Tuechi-san, "Cause if you dont, it's my treat today."

"No, no... I feel like doing some dishes today."

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well, i like where this story is going so far, postive flames, suggestions, reviews, welcome.  



	3. Going crazy

I had a few versions of this chapter on my pc aswell, im sure its the right version, anyways, heres the latest update on this story! hopefully you guys enjoy my thinking on my feet style. lol

i felt as though the ending of this chapter was a bit shaky... imo... Oh well... we learn from our mistakes right?

and to aswer some pm's, Kyuukyoku Honoo no Jutsu is something i made up myself. i went on google and typed in japanese words. i found a japanese/english dictionary and i created sed Jutsu. If i remember correctly i believe it means Extreme flames or soemthing like that.

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"I told you Sakura-chan… I would bring him back to you" he said with a humble look on his face. He turned his back towards me, the flames of his strange new technique dancing wildly around him. He faced Itachi and what was left of Akatsuki, and he raised his hands to make a final seal.

Naruto… stop…

I wanted to yell those words, but my voice was silent and mute as I moved my lips.

Stop… you idiot… you're going to die…

I watched helplessly, as these familiar turn of events replayed itself in front of me.

"Kyuukyoku Honoo no Jutsu!" he yelled, flames engulfing him and everything else. Just like it had done before.

Naruto…

The raging flames consumed everything, I flinched and raised my arms to protect myself as the wave of intensely bright flames of hell came flowing over me, and soon the explosive sound of the hideout crumbling over us vanished, and was replaced by a tranquil silence.

I'm… not burning?

I lowered my arms and opened my eyes to see what was going on. As I lowered my arms, the blinding light was replaced by an eerie night sky with a blood red moon. Around me, a shallow red sea that licked the sides of my boots and extending in every direction for an eternity, the wind hissed around me and gave me an unwelcome feeling in this strange world.

Where… is this place? What's going on?

My answer soon came in the form of a large explosion in the distance, the sonic boom of the explosion was enough for me to raise my arms back up to fight against the force of the sonic boom. The shock of the second random explosion created a small wave of the red water that splashed into my shins… it felt thick and warm to the touch.

I couldn't see a thing the cutting wind of the shockwave didn't allow me to open my eyes and observe what was going on.

Another explosion went off closer than the first, and this time it threw me off my feet. I landed butt first into the grotesque sea. I was soaked from the waist down in this bloody water, this second explosion was as loud and ear shattering as the first, and the consecutiveness of the second explosion caught me off guard and I didn't get a chance to brace myself…

I would have been freaking out at this point, half soaked in thick, warm blood-like water, but before I could, I finally got to open my eyes as the gust's finally subsided… and there, standing in front of me…

Naruto?

His back was faced away from me, but even in this bloody light and clearing smoke, I could recognize that wild and spiky form anywhere. And soon I forgot about the thick red water I was soaked in…

Naruto!

My lips moved but no words came out. I called his name again,

Naruto!

Again, no words came fourth, but I didn't let that stop me from leaping forward and make a dead sprint towards the knuckle head. I wanted to embrace the idiot, turn him around and see his face again for the first time in what felt like years…

I quickly got to my feet and leapt forward to make the sprint, leaving the red water behind…But my pace was slow and sluggish, I commanded my legs to sprint towards Naruto faster, but my legs only responded in an even slower pace. Each step I took felt like an eternity.

As I made my slow crawl towards him, another figure appeared in the settling smoke of the second explosion, I recognized that figure as well.

Uchiha… Itachi…

His eyes were as red this world's moon, and he had a Katana in his hand. As the smoke cleared completely, he raised the blade taking a charging stance as the sword glistened in the red moonlight.

"I'm surprised you are able to fight freely like this in my world of Tsukuyomi Naruto-kun… But you won't for much longer." Itachi said in a sinister tone. "Where is that demonic Chakra of yours that you used so well back in the real world? Perhaps you are finally ready to die?"

Naruto only stared down the powerful Uchiha member, unhindered in the presence of the Sharingan, he held his ground bravely, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" he yelled making a seal.

A Shadow clone appeared in a puff of smoke next to Naruto. "I can't die yet!" Naruto yelled extending his hand towards his clone.

"Hoh? Why is that?" he asked nearly mocking him.

Naruto was breathing hard, "Cause… I know Sasuke and Sakura-chan are safe out there…" he began as his clone began channeling chakra into his hand. "I kept my promise to Sakura-chan. And now… I'm gonna do Sasuke a big favor… So when I get outta here, He's gonna owe me big time."

A Bright blue Rasengan formed in his hand… it whirled and made the distinct sound it always did as it spun around faster and faster. The blue orb of chakra seemed to glow brightly in this dim alternate world… as it did so… it shed some light onto Naruto.

From behind I could see the orange jacket he always wore, but it was stained in blood and was torn almost past the point of recognition. His pants were also cut up and starched in blood. I couldn't see his face, but… the back of his neck, was covered in a sheen of blood that was caked into his skin, I didn't know if any of that blood was his or if it was from this red sea, but either way… he looked like a war-torn soldier who had been battling non-stop for an eternity.

"What makes you think you can win now?" asked the sinister Uchiha, readying himself for another lunge towards Naruto.

"Because… I'm not dead yet!"

Those words echoed in my mind, I tried harder to run faster, my slow sprint was slower than it was before… I demanded my legs go faster, stop the idiot before he hurt himself more than he already has… but they were moving in a totally different speed than I was, and the two powerful Ninja's collided… making the same ear shattering explosion as before.. And it all went blank.

-

Naruto…

"Naruto!" I finally yelled, sitting up from behind Tsunade-sama's desk feeling slightly dizzy and drowsy. The world I was in vanished.

Shizune-san literally jumped from my spontaneous reaction, dropping all the books she was carrying. When she came back down to earth, she was breathing deeply, surprise and shock in her face. "Sakura-chan! Don't scare me like that!!" she yelled placing her hand over her beating heart to calm herself down.

I quickly looked around, I saw the same bookshelves with the same volumes of books in them, the same desk I had working behind since morning… it was a dream? No… it was far too real…

"Shizune-san, Naruto is alive!" I said as I remembered everything, "He's alive! I saw him!" I said standing from the comfortable Hokage chair.

Shizune-san gave me a strange look, "Sakura-chan? Are you ok?" She said rubbing her head. "Do you have any idea how insane that sounds?"

"No! Listen to me… He's alive… I saw him! He said he wasn't dead yet!!" I said listening to myself… it did sound outrageous.. But, that dream was far too real to be fake… That world he was in, the sea of blood… I felt it, I was soaked in the stuff… I felt it on my skin! And those… those explosions, I felt the impact of them in my chest… they were real!

"Sakura-chan… calm down. You had a nightmare." She said signaling with her hands to tell me to calm down. "I know you miss him… but…" she hesitated to finish her sentence, "He's…"

I stopped her before she could finish. "No! He's not! I'm telling you.. He's alive out there somewhere!" I said pointing out the window. I felt like I was going crazy… "Call Tsunade-sama I need to tell her." I said readying my self to leave and search for her. "We need to find him… He's still alive!"

"Tsunade-sama is in a meeting remember? That's why you're helping me today with her papers!" Shizune-san yelled, trying to keep me in control.

She didn't do so well to do so, I was nearly running out of the room as I didn't pay any attention to what she was yelling at me.

"Sakura-chan!" yelled Shizune-san, "Stop! Just stop it!" she yelled louder.

I turned around to her, finally responding to her loud screams. She had two streams of tears flowing down her cheeks, she was shaking, holding in her emotions. "Sakura-chan… I know you are taking Naruto-kun's passing painfully…" she sniffled a little before she continued, "But, that is no reason for spouting out random nonsense!!"

Nonsense? "You don't believe me? I swear to you… He's out there… He's alive!" I yelled as the drowsiness you always feel when you suddenly wake up, began to fade away… and logic and common sense was beginning to settle in again… Logic and Common sense told me I was insane…

"Sakura-chan… I miss him too… so does Tsunade-sama… so does everybody else in the village… You're not alone." She said coming closer to me.

I stood where I was, looking down at my feet, I thought about the dream I had again, was it really fake? I was shivering… I felt cold… Am I really going crazy? Am I… going crazy?

Two streams of tears began to trickle down my own cheeks. I was confused, irate, and frustrated… It was all just a dream… but…

Finally Shizune-san was close to me and she embraced me in a hug, "Sakura-chan… I know it hurts… but you have to face the truth."

I cried into her shoulder a little bit… maybe I was just taking this all too seriously…

"The truth is the truth… and nothing can change that…" she said placing her chin on top of my head.

The truth… is the truth…

I broke away from Shizune-san's arms, and burst through the large doors of the office.

"Sakura-chan! Where are you going?"

"To find the Truth!"

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As always positve flames, reviews, and suggestions are always welcome! 


	4. My fault

A/n:

Hello! Heres ch4 of this story, i worked on this during lectures, free time and in between some other stuff while i was moving into my new apt. at some points may seem like it skips(Maybe) because i was working on this seperate days which were like; a few days in between. anyway hope you enjoy!

I took into consideration some suggestions, and i converseed with some readers, and i think i did a pretty good job (i think) with integrating them into the story.

did i forget to mention it is REALLY hot in Socal right now? geez, no way im going out to the local skatepark now... guess that means more time for you "lucky" readers.

* * *

I was still feeling wobbly from when I suddenly woke up back at the office, my legs shook under me, and they threatened to buckle. But I didn't allow it, no matter what my body threatened to do, I wouldn't allow it to do anything until I found who I was looking for. I was also still feeling a little distraught from my conversation with Shizune-san, but I kept my mind clear of it for the most part. I ran faster and faster, weaving around the crowded market street in the oppressive heat. 

_The truth is the truth… and nothing can change that_… I thought as I ran faster.

Shizune-san's words repeated themselves in my mind over and over again as I made my sprint to my destination. And no matter how I looked at it, she was right… You can't change the truth, and the truth will always be the truth… no matter what.

But then… what _is _the truth?

What was it…really?

I saw the flames engulf everything that day, it destroyed everything within its reach, and it almost killed me and my team as well…

But… in my dream, the grotesque sea, the piercing red moon, and the clear image of Naruto standing in front of me facing off against Uchiha Itachi. It was real…

Which one do I believe?

I bumped into a few people, I couldn't dodge them quickly enough with all these thoughts distracting me. The people I bumped into, turned and yelled at me, but I didn't pay any mind to them… I had to find her… she can help me find the truth I was looking for.

-

Finally, I made it to my destination… I was so tired… honestly tired… The distance between here and the office wasn't that far, but all those nights without sleep was finally catching up to me quickly, in fact I don't think I've even had a full meal since that day I went to Ichiraku. I burst through the glass doors, "Ino!" I yelled with whatever breathe I had left in my lungs. "Ino!!" I called again.

There was nobody in the flower shop, just the counter with the register and a half empty room of roses, daisies daffodils and a bunch of other random flowers scattered across the shop. I stammered to the counter walking on whatever reserves I had left. It was so hot outside it sapped whatever energy I had, and I was sweating everywhere, I was sweating so much that it was dripping from my chin and down from my fingertips without any end…

"Ino! Where are you?" I yelled once more leaning onto the counter.

"I'm here you impatient moron!" came a cocky response from the back room. "What do you … Sakura?" she said in a semi-shocked manner as she walked into the flower shop, clearly she wasn't expecting my sudden and noisy visit. "What are you doing here? And you're getting your nasty sweat onto my counter!"

"Sorry…" I panted, "I.. need to talk to you."

"Sakura, are you ok? Why are you upset? You don't look so good."

The room was beginning to spin a little… it was an early sign of heat stroke, damnit… My body had finally had enough with me and my exhaustion, and it slowly began to shut down, I could feel it... I did my best to fight against it.

"Ino… I need… you to help me with something…" I said still panting breathlessly.

My legs slowly began to give out, they wouldn't carry my heavy body any longer.

"Sakura… what… Hey Sakura!" she yelled, as the room finally faded out behind a black curtain… Damn…

-

It was all a nightmare, a living nightmare… All this time after that day... and not one moment, was ever… normal. I spent everyday, wandering around the streets, doing whatever that needed to be done; helping someone on the street with something heavy, going to the office to read random novels on random subjects, going to the hospital to check up on Sasuke-kun, and to help anybody who needed it there.

In my mind, I told myself, I was helping people… but in reality, I was just trying to keep my mind off of Naruto, and keep the guilt behind me. But, even so… just about everything reminded me of him… and guilt would sneak up on me every single time.

At the Ramen bar… _"Don't worry about Sasuke, He'll never go to that freak! I guarantee it_!" he said…

At the main gates to Konoha…_ "I'll bring back Sasuke! That's a promise of a lifetime_!" he said.

At the hospital…_"I promised I would bring him back Sakura-chan… I will keep my promise! That's my way of the Ninja!" _ he said.

And finally…_"I told you Sakura-chan… I would bring him back to you…"_

I pictured him smiling at me, it wasn't that foxy smile he always gave to everybody, but it was a smile that told me… he was glad to do all this for me… Why?

Why? Why are you always pushing yourself? Why didn't you ever stop and think about yourself for once? Why didn't you just worry about your own well being? Why did you keep your promise to me? You shouldn't have if it meant dying… You idiot…

I never told you... I...

-

"Sakura… Hey… Sakura…" came a familiar voice. "Wake up… c'mon!"

I slowly slid my eyes open, the picture of Naruto replaced with the semi-blinding light of the roof light. The sound of slow spinning blades of a roof fan slowly echoed along with my slow heartbeat in my head, and something was tickling my nose. It was itchy…

"Ino…" I said in a raspy tone. "Your hair is in my face."

"Sorry." She said, tucking her stray strand of hair behind her ear. "Are you ok? Don't scare me like that! I thought you were drunk or something!"

"I'm sorry about that… Where am I?" I asked looking around where I lay.

"Oh, you're lying on a couch in the backroom of our flower shop… are you sure you're ok? You seemed a little upset when you came in." she said still looking down at me.

I slowly began to sit up, exhaustion still fresh in my system, "Yeah, I'm fine… just.. tired." I was feeling sore everywhere…

"Damnit forehead girl, you haven't been eating or sleeping properly haven't you?" she said putting her hands on her hips pouting at me.

"What makes you say that?" I asked bringing my hand to my woozy head.

"You're clothes…" she said pointing her finger at me.

"My clothes?" I asked looking up to her confused.

"Yeah, they don't fit you as well as they did before, they're a clear one and a half sizes bigger now! And your eyes have the worst bags I have ever seen under them!" she continued criticizing my appearance.

"I'm fine… don't worry about me." I responded as I swung my legs over the side of the couch. "Besides, there's…"

"No, you're not fine!" she slightly yelled cutting me off. "Look at you! I've never seen you so depressed in such a long time! What's the matter with you?!" she said nearly yelling.

I wanted to defend myself from her onslaught of criticism, but I was compelled to stay quiet and listen to her put me on the spot. Perhaps the exhaustion was still taking its toll on my body, and besides, I think I deserved it in a way.

I looked into my lap and folded my hands neatly onto them, waiting for Ino to continue her criticism towards me.

"Sakura…" she said finally ceasing her criticism, "What's the matter… really… I haven't seen you so upset like this before." She said finally calming herself down.

She mustn't have heard the news yet… I guess Tsunade-sama still hasn't released the information of our mission to the public yet… It was no surprise, she was probably taking this pretty hard too.

"Ino…" I said to her looking into my lap, "Can you jump into my mind?"

"What?" She responded confusedly.

"The Yamanaka Clan has the ability to control people's minds doesn't it?"

"Y-yes…"

"Then… isn't there a technique your family uses so you can you see into one's mind?" I asked still staring into my lap.

"Well… We do sure, but it's usually used on recon missions, to see into the enemy's minds to gather information…"

"I want you to jump into my mind then…"

"W-why?" she stuttered.

"Look," I said finally looking up to her, "just do it… Please…"

Ino just stared at me totally confused, but if I know her as much as I think I do… Her curiosity would get the best of her, and she would do it just to get the whole story of the situation.

"Fine…" she finally said, "But if anything goes wrong… it's not my fault, ok? I haven't mastered this technique completely yet."

I nodded slowly in response.

"Alright then…Here I go.." she said taking a breath in and making a seal with her hands.

I lowered my head again and closed my eyes. I did my best to keep my mind clear of any distractions that would hamper with Ino's technique, and to help her speed the process up a bit. But… a few seconds into it, my mind began to wander off about the whole situation. I suddenly got the chills, and began to shiver uncontrollably… I felt cold, even though the room itself was warm from the hot day. I felt two tears building behind my eyelids, and a lump growing in my throat. I tried not to let the tears leak through… But as I focused on my tears, my throat began to tremble, and I began to whimper, I did my best to suppress it, but it was no use, I couldn't control it.

After a few minutes, I felt something sit itself down next to me, and two warm arms wrapped themselves around me from the side, "Sorry Sakura… I understand now…" Ino said, finally breaking the silence between me and her.

I was still tearing uncontrollably, "W-why?" I asked opening my and looking over to her.

"I didn't know your mission was so terrible… I didn't know Naruto had…" she said not finishing the last word, wrapping her arms around me tighter to calm me down.

I began to whimper again, "I-Ino…" I whimpered.

"And… I'm sorry… but that dream… it was just a dream Sakura…" she said lowering my head onto her shoulder. "That's what you came here for isn't it?"

I laid my head onto her shoulder and cried some more. She told me something I knew I was going to hear, but I hoped and wished that I would hear something else… I wanted to hear her say it was a sign that he was still alive out there somewhere…

"B-but…" I said hiccupping a little, "I… that dream… it was… so real… It can't be…"

She stroked her fingers through my hair to try and calm me down, "Sakura… It was just a dream… Naruto… He's gone… He died protecting you…"

I began to sob now, I was destroyed on the inside… whatever hope I had left, was completely destroyed and gone… I had my truth now... and I hated it.

"Shh… Sakura…" she said rocking back and fourth, "You shouldn't be crying… You should be happy you are alive…"

No…

"No… Ino.. You don't understand… Naruto is dead because of me!" I said nearly yelling, I lifted my head away from her shoulder, "He died because of me! I shouldn't have asked him to bring back Sasuke!" I broke free of her arms, and stood up in front of the couch.

"Don't you get it now?! I killed him!!" I was now completely yelling and no longer in control of my emotions… I wanted to so badly for Naruto to be alive, I wanted him to be here next to me smiling brightly… That way, I wouldn't be feeling this way… I was so selfish…

I turned away from Ino to run out of the room, but instead, I wobbled to the wall next to the doorway and leaned my arm on it and then my head onto my forearm, still crying and screaming.

"Sakura, please calm down! Please! You're scaring me!!" Ino said from behind me.

I slowly knelt down in front of the wall, and continued to cry into my forearm. I placed my hand over my chest where my heart was throbbing, it felt like it was going to jump right out of my chest. I gripped my shirt tightly and continued to cry.

"Sakura!" yelled Ino as she placed her hand over my shoulder. "Stand up! Stop doing this to yourself! It's not your fault!"

Yes it is… Yes it is…

"Sakura, Naruto wouldn't want you do be like this!" she yelled over my cries.

But… it was _my _fault.

"I know you cared for him… but doing this won't bring him back! You gotta stop blaming yourself!!" she continued as she shook my shoulder.

But… It was because of me he died… I killed him… I made him make me a promise… a promise of a lifetime he couldn't refuse… So I'm guilty…

I felt my heart race faster and faster… it was beyond pain… I ceased to cry and I fell to the floor… my lips stopped moving and I lay on my side staring into wall with a blank stare… all went mute, and Ino became a fuzzy muted sound in my ears. She continued to call my name, but I couldn't respond to her… my body wouldn't let me.

I closed my eyes, and sleep came and took me away…

He came to me again… he was smiling again… Naruto… I'm sorry…It was because of me… because of me…

* * *

before anybody asks, Is he really dead? i can only answer "we'll see" half because of suggestions, and half because this story is going on random ideas. lol 

as always, questions, suggestions please?, reviews, and positive flames are welcome...

peace!


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